The other day I got the chance to takeover a local shop in the area and it was an amazing event that I will cherish. But it was also a realization of my own spiritual growth blockages that I still need to learn to overcome. Its hard to explain sometimes on how shadow work or spiritual growth realizations can come from anywhere. Sometimes in our path we feel like we have over came some things , only to realize we havent. Yesterday brought upon that realization for me and it weighed on my mind. Over the last few years I took the time of covid to deep dive into myself as many of us did. Who am I? What is my purpose? Where have I went wrong? Was I truly right about a situation?
Over that time period, I had many realizations of myself and I do feel I've made my own personal improvements. But I also realize that healing over hurt is a process and can be reawakened and felt over and over again. I've asked myself "How do I get past this? What can I do to improve and abolish the feeling it brings in me. Yet to be honest I dont know where the answer to that question lies. As a pagan woman in a society that is fueled by control over how we think, feel and do with our bodies. Its hard to navigate the waters of ones self and allowing emotions to show without being precieved a certain way. In my years I've been known as many things to my community. A mother, A leader, A bitch, and each one is true within its own right depending on the perspective of the individual being asked. Because experience is based on perspective and each perspective is based on personal experience.
I've worked with Hekate , The mother of the crossroads all my pagan life and have found comfort in my goddess. She has guided me and corrected me when I didnt know what to do or even who I was. But the experiences she brings me to at times is not the most pleasant and sometimes I have to find the lesson in it. The road with Hekate is a strange yet beautiful experience and one that is a lonely road at times. You have many people come in and out of your life and its hard getting use to. Change is never easy and she is a goddess that brings forth change in oneself and surroundings. Some get brought to you by spiritual need for themselves and others get brought to you for your own spiritual growth. As we edge our way closer to the divine feminine event in the world we life in. I keep asking myself what it means for me and my path and how embracing that brings healing to it.
The statement thats rang in my head on repeat is "forgive but do not forget", which is the spiritual dilemma I find myself in. I can forgive and know each spiritual path has its moments of good and bad. But the forgetting it and moving past it to a point where subjects no longer sting, now that's the tricky part. Especially when you know you're not the only one who has seen it take place. Vindicating that what you feel and felt where a genuine response that anyone with a pulse would feel. How does one confront that and turn a negative into a positive that is productive for all. For this is what I wish to explore and hopefully learn this year so that I can carry on with me and my path. Because every lesson that is learned is one that can be overcome with time and perspective. I write this because I know I'm not the only one who faces obstacles in my path such as this. Maybe writing this not only helps my journey but another journey as well in the healing process. We create bonds sometimes physically and sometimes spiritually while embracing our humanity. Its conversations such as these and knowing that as individuals and communities we can grow in a positive direction. Self-reflection and mindfulness within one's self are an important part of my journey. It helps me know where I'm at and where I need to be in my path. Learning doesn't stop it just expands and becomes more complex in the growth it brings to one's self. So see this as a reminder to be self-aware even in the happiest of times, because growth shows its head in everything we are and do.
The Devine Witch
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