When I have considered sharing my spiritual journey of awakening I often get overwhelmed. Where would I even begin? What would be the focus? Would I sound "crazy"? Trying to describe something that only meant something to me? I know in my heart that this story is meant to be told through my own experience and lens. Call it intuition, call it my purpose, or maybe it is just so I can wrap this part of my journey up in a nice little bow the only way I know how, through my words. I assume the best place to start would be the beginning of this story, and I don’t mean the day I was born, but rather the beginning of my social work career. September 2009. I just completed my Bachelor’s degree and started working for a local non-profit that serves the homeless community.
I had been with the agency for the past year completing my senior practicum internship and was hired part-time before I even graduated. I remember feeling as if I finally fit in somewhere. I felt I was really good at what I did and also felt respected for my knowledge. Between the hard work and effort, I put into my education and now career. People seemed to listen to me, and looking back my ego loved that part. This is probably one reason I felt so good when being validated by those around me.
Starting here is also appropriate to introduce an important character in this story who is now one of my biggest spiritual guides from beyond the veil of this earthly plane. For the sake of this story, I'll call her Angel, after all, that is what she is. From the beginning, she took me under her wing. I'll never forget the day we were standing in the kitchen at work and she told me I would “ take over for her one day”. I was shocked, as I hadn’t even worked there a year, and now I know that she didn’t just mean the boss of the agency. Maybe I was taking over some of her work here, by being kind, generous, and as compassionate as she was. Angel was a guide for me here on Earth, having her in my corner was a gift I didn’t know at the time I had.
She taught me everything there was to know about being a good social worker, “ Do what you know is right and apologize later” were words that I still carry with me today. She lived her life as I would imagine Jesus did, always sitting with those that were considered “sinners” or the undesired part of society. Always standing up for what she believed in, she was a force to be reckoned with. Unfortunately, she left this earth on 8/21/2017. However, she will continue to show up in my journey and I hope you will love hearing about her as much as I love talking about her.
From 2009-2016 life was somewhat normal through my lens of perspective. I had gotten married, had a baby girl, and was now getting divorced leaving me again a single mom, now with an 11 yr old and a baby. My oldest daughter's father and childhood friend passed away during this time and my marriage turned out not to be the fairytale I hoped for. Funny, how I chose the adjective normal and those words came out. As I said though, through my perspective, which I am still learning means a lot in this Universe. I remember feeling so empowered that I was leaving a toxic marriage that included lots of emotional abuse and showed signs of just getting worse. I should mention in this part, I was raised in a small town where my Mom was a teacher at the school and my Dad was Pastor at a local church for part of my childhood. I had moved away, but not far. Now that I was getting divorced, I decided to go back to that little town. I had also started working for a crisis team, assisting police on mental health calls. Again, I felt very respected in this position, people listened to me. Or so I thought. Besides being a bad-ass social worker and single mom, I started to get into the well-worn path.
As I grew up in the church, I had always questioned it, never believing in the whole “ must follow Jesus or go to hell” or is it “ must ask Jesus to forgive you or go to hell”? Either way, I wasn’t buying any of it and hadn’t really given religion a second thought since my teenage years. The spiritual journey began with Human Design and Astrology, I started to notice patterns with clients/crisis calls and the moon phase. I mean, I would be bored waiting for police to show up to calls, what else did I have to do? Also, it was just for fun, not impacting my clinical judgment in any way. I also started to learn about myself, and maybe why I was attracting toxic relationships. I started to realize that my family might not see me the way everyone else saw me. Then I started to realize that maybe I was the only one that saw myself as this great, empowered woman that had reached all her greatest dreams. The awakening was definitely beginning and I had no idea what was to come…
The Devine Witch
Meg
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